Birth Order and Its Influences on Your Life Adjustment
Children born in the family can carry some expectations, whether from their parents or from the society. Older children are expected to carry the family besides parents. Younger children are usually expected to follow the footsteps of their older siblings. Lucille K. Forer explains this phenomena in her book, on how birth order can affect not only the expectations you have from people around you but also affecttheir relationship with parents and how children see themselves and others.The role of a child according to their birth order is real. The oldest child is expected to support the family when the parents are not by their children. Forer explains that when a sibling arrives, the oldest child tries to suppress the view of himself as a child, and he struggles to be parental. The oldest child is also expected to be more capable and more responsible than the younger children.Parents are usually more lenient to the youngest child and sometimes they spoil him. Forer states that the later children enjoy many advantages as a result of having more relaxed parents. Forer also states that the youngest child tends to think that he is not concerned about being less able to do many things than other people because there are always others around to take care of me.I think Forer’s idea applies not only in a typical American family, but also in general family. In general, the older children are responsible for their younger siblings. In a poor family, specifically, the oldest child is prioritized by parents to get better education so the oldest child can soon take care of his younger siblings. The youngest child, getting attention from his parents andolder siblings tends to be spoiled and may pout when they don’t get what they want. The youngest child is viewed by people as less capable than his older siblings. But there are some youngest children who feel they need to stand out from their older siblings’ “shadow” so they can be responsible for their own. For them, to be assuccessful or even better, than their older siblings is their goal in life therefore they work harder to get past their older siblings.As in my family, Forer’s idea has some accuracy and inaccuracy. As an oldest child of two, I view myself not only as a child of my family but also a role model for my little brother. Because of our age gap, I view myself as a second parent for him, remind him what’s wrong and right and give him advice. I follow my role as a child in my family and also struggle to be parental. My younger brother also tends to be dependenton others because all of the attention he gets. As for the oldest child capability, I do not think myself as more capable than my younger brother. Instead, I learn much from my younger brother, about computer, movies and music. My younger brother is even smarter than when I was his age.It is interesting to read Forer’s idea about birth order and how it influences the role of children. Although not all family follow Forer’s idea, but this idea nearly covers typical family in the world, not only in American family. Oldest child tends to be parental and expected to be more capable than his younger siblings. The youngest child is often spoiled and more dependent on others, either parents or his older siblings.
